First Republican Debate, YIPPIE

Republicans Held a Debate in South Carolina and the writing staff at SNL was thrilled.    "Its hard being a comedy writer and turning out a new script each week"   said Seth Meyers head writer at Saturday Night Live.      "These republican debators have gone over board to make our jobs easier."

Seth Myers, Head Writer SNL

GREENVILLE, S.C. -- It may have been the moment when former New Mexico Gov. Gary Johnson extended his
riff about how his reality TV show would be different from Sarah Palin’s   “crawling on her hands and knees up the ice floe in Alaska.”    Johnson also has plans to leagalize pot and divert the taxes on Mary Jane to fixing Pot Holes and making the allignment of our vehicles more secure and lasting.     But it was Johnson's plan to leagelize prostitution that caught the most attention.       Frank Luntz polled his Fox picked group of respondents and found no one who thought it wasn't already legal in South Carolina, most thinking the change came under Gov. Mark Sanford. 

Gary Johnson Campaign Poster

Gary Johnson's campaign slogan,  "Pot for Potholes, better roads for you and me".    I can hear hordes of republicans in the audience chanting it now,   "Pot for Potholes, better roads for you and me."     Look for it on bumper stickers all across America.    As Snoop Dogg might say, "Fer Snizzle Dizzle Issle".     As with all Snoop Dog phrases we are unsure of the spelling.

The One and Only "Snoop Dogg"

Or perhaps it was when Rep. Ron Paul (R-Texas) explained why not everyone would use heroin if it were legalized.    De- criminalizing drugs is a big deal with the republicans who feel if everyone had the opportunity to get high without worring about the law it would be a better world.     This crop of republican hopefulls is looking at freeing up reffer and herion.     If the republicans can manage to make drugs and prostitution legal their family values stance will be easier to keep.    The Democrats lag way behind on this drug issue, they are just looking for ways to reduce the costs of perscription medecine so that Doctor authorized RX's are cheaper.    Like Mitt Romney,  Democrats want to extend health care to all citizens.

Ron Paul takes a stand in support of the BIG H

Thank You Ron Paul

Either way, the Libertarian-minded iconoclasts who bookended the stage here Thursday night at the first Republican presidential primary debate provided plenty of highlights and some substance, but also took the forum wildly off track at times.    If you missed it and odds are good you did and desire to see it and odds are good you don't just flip to Fox as they are showing it around the clock until the next debate.    Fox officials say the replays of the debte will only be interrupted by extremely important breaking news and that means nothing Democrats do will affect your ability to view the republican debate.

The result:    South Carolinians already a bit on edge about the lack of top-tier GOP names at their debate got a little hotter under the collar.     Several of the debators were surprised to learn that South Carolina was a state.     Others like Michele Bachmann didn't think the state opened until after Labor Day and didn't attend the debate.    Newt Gingrich said he was too old to ride a bus to the South Carolina line and then hike in to the debate.     Plans are under consideration to hold the next South Carolina debate in Richmond, Virginia.   If you don't know the way flip your high school diploma over, there is a map.   For the other 60% of you, use Goggle maps.

Newt Too Old for The Journey

“I’m not going to comment on that,”   Rep. Jeff Duncan (R-S.C.) said when asked about Paul’s heroin comments.     “Unbelievable that they even came out in this debate.”    "It gives the impression that South Carolina is backwards, that Carolinians can't get their herion now."

“The nation is $14 trillion in debt,”    Duncan said after the debate.     "We're so poor we have trouble giving our wealthy citizens, our upper 2 per cent, the tax breaks they deserve.     We have to continually fight with Democrats as we try to reward our upper class citizens.      There can be no trickle down unless we top load the system.    We’ve got a lot of other problems that we need to focus on, stop the fiscal insanity in this country.     Rich people know what to do with money, poor people don't.    I think we’ve got a lot of work to do.   The candidates who talked about that were on message.   The candidates that got off of that were not on message.”

Jeff is a "Tell It Like He Thinks It Is" guy

“If I had had to advise them I would say get back to the issues that are at hand:   American energy independence, the rising prices at the pump, de-ciminalizing pot and herion, bad potholes in our roads, ageing and whitening the next president and raising the credit limit on our nation’s national debt,”    Jeff added.

Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) blanched at talk by Johnson of legalized abortion and by Paul of allowing gays to marry.   Paul thought these gay marriages had a great chance to last forever especially with his other plan to leagelize herion and he noted that gays had no interest at all in abortion.   DeMint said he was too old to get involved in a gay marriage though he had spent a few days experimenting with the situation, but not for a couple of years.   DeMint said that controlling abortions was one of the few ways males had left to control females and he lamented the thought that the power would be lost.     DeMint keeps a book of little used words and phrases like blanched, lamented an respect for others.

Jim hears voices inside his head and listens to them

“I disagreed with the idea that there should be any taxpayer funded abortions, any higher taxes or the federal government redefining marriage, or anybody allowing gays to live together or form partnerships of any kind”    DeMint said.     “I wasn’t quite sure if I was hearing that or not as there are no gay people in South Carolina and no real republican would say what I might have heard.”    DeMint went immediately to the local CVS after the debate and purchased new batteries for his hearing aid.    "I generally don't replace the batteries until the senate session ends"  Demint said.

Much of the debate, written, staged and hosted by Fox News, understandably focused on foreign policy, given George W Bush's killing of Al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden earlier this week.      A number of questions also concerned tax breaks for the upper two percent, limiting Obama to one term or less, social and religious right issues.

But the candidates spent little time discussing America's sustained high unemployment rate or what to do about creating more jobs.   The generally agreed sentiment was we will solve problems later if we win some office but for now let the problems attach themselves to Obama.   Joblessness was only tangentially connected to a few questions about lowering taxes on those earning over 250 thousand a year,  cleansing America of organized labor and pushing the national debt foreward and sharing the bulk of it with future generations.

Tim  Entered The Debate Number One, Finished Second to a Pizza Cupon

Former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty was even asked whether he believes in creationism, which aides said afterward they had not anticipated.    Pawlenty said the earth was 6,000 years old and thought to be flat until the late 1940's when it was also discovered that the earth was not the center of the universe.    The sun being the center of the universe is only a theory and open to discussion by republicans who have it on good authority that dinosauers still hide in the nooks and crannies of the earth with bigfoot and the Lock Ness Monster.    Most of the audience slept thru Pawlenty's answer.
Pawlenty entered the night with the risk of being dragged down into second-tier or novelty issues by his opponents, and while he tried to stay above the fray, he faced tough questions about his past statements supporting cap and trade and about his management of Minnesota’s budget, which left the state with a projected $6 billion deficit over the next two years.     Pawlenty denied that Minnesota had a budget but when pressed admitted that they might have one but that he was unaware of it.     Those in the crowd not already sleeping joined those who were.   Pawlenty was holdin his own.

When Fox News’ Chris Wallace introduced a clip of a commercial where Pawlenty called for the government to   “cap greenhouse gas pollution now,”    the former governor exclaimed amiably,   “Thats not me”.    Then Pawlenty explained that  "it was an impersonator in the film clip and that he would never do such a thing, that he stood fore square for pollution and the Koch Brothers making money."     Chris Wallace, tough as nails Fox newsman, said he suspected it was an impersonator but wanted to hear Pawlenty say it and that he now considered the matter settled.

Yet other Republicans gave Pawlenty some credit for saying forthrightly that he messed up:   “It was wrong, it was a mistake, Obama tricked me, I was misquoted, that was not what I was attempting to say, a staffer did it but I take full responsibility, it was a dirty democratic trick, I hit the wrong button by accident, I thought they were trading ball caps with me, I temporarly forgot my previous position on the issue, it could happen to anyone, my heart was in the right place, I didn't do it  and I’m sorry,”    he said in response to his cap and trade flip-flop.    The other repulicans stressed how little use republicans have for anyone who tells the truth or gets caught telling the truth or gets caught messing up.

Some party members see this as a clear contrast to former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney’s refusal to admit making a mistake in passing universal health coverage in his state.   “For him to man up and say he made a mistake showed tremendous courage on his part,”    Duncan said.   Romney declined to travel to South
Carolina for several reasons.    Traveling by horse and buggy hurt his back side, no one of any importance or note was going to be there and he had an appointment to get his hair done.   "Do you know how hard it is to get an appointment with Mr. Phyllis"  Romney asked.     

Mitt Messed Up by Helping Others, Something Republicans Never Do

Republicans have never forgiven Romney who messed up and gave all the citizens in his state health care.      It is well known and understood that republicans never do anything for anybody unless their incomes fall in the upper 2% of wage earners and Romney violated the republican golden rule.

FREE Pizza for Every One

In a somewhat surprising turn of events, however, former Godfather's Pizza CEO Herman Cain emerged from the first debate with the highest rating from Fox News' focus group.    Everyone in the audience found taped to the bottom of their seats several cupons for free pizzas from Godfathers.    The average length of time the focus group had worked fo Godfathers Pizza was 4 years and 3 months.

Herman placed Cupons Under Every Seat

Some republicans complained that they didn't get pizza cupons and Herman Cain knew he had taped one under every seat.     Donald Trump offered to solve the mystery.     Trump assigned his crack team of investigators to the case.     Luckily they had solved the President's birth certificate case and were available.      They discovered that when Pawlenty put large sections of the audience to sleep with his presentation that those who were awake stole the cupons from the sleeping republicans.      Thank you Donald Trump.      I am so proud that you were able to bring resolution to such a earth shaking mystery.      No wonder the Don heads Trump University.      Three cheers for old Blow Hole U.

“I have never had this kind of reaction until tonight.   Something very special happened this evening and had I not preread the Fox script I would have been completely taken aback,”     said Republican paid pollster Frank Luntz, after the 29-person group unanimously concluded that Cain had won.     Per Script only one

person in the group began the night supporting Cain.   The actor playing the Cain supporter at the beginning of the evening was chosen by having names drawn from a hat in a completely Fox like random way.     All agreed that putting pizza cupons under ther seats was very Opra like.

Chip Felkel, a local Republican consultant who worked with Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour until Barbour’s decision not to run, called Cain's performance  “impressive”  and added that former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum  “did himself well.”  

Rick thanked Chip for his kind words and added "I've been doing myself well for years"    The team of Felkel and Babour were famous throught the south for being unaware that black Americans had ever suffered any discrimination of any kind at any time for any reason.

Rick was accused of "Doing Himself Well"

Of  Pawlenty, Felkel said that   “while he probably showed the most in terms of broadest appeal of those on stage, [he] looked a tad too prepped.”     Felkel has planted a field of cotton in preperation to rotating to pot if Johnson captures the presidency.   Tad is a southern word meaning a little and should be added to DeMints book of little used words and phrases.

In the end, Pawlenty emerged in essentially the same condition he entered the night (boreing, unexciting and sleep inducing):   slowly ambling along, the candidate with the least flaws in a primary that so far is full of other hopefuls with plenty of baggage.

Ron Paul said South Carolina was quite modern when compared to Texas.

OBAMA Thanks The Troops

President Barack Obama capped a week of somber and sometimes celebratory events following the successful

strike against Osama bin Laden with a rally for U.S. troops, where he held up the al Qaeda leader's slaying as evidence that his Afghanistan war strategy is working.

"This has been an historic week in the life of our nation,"   President Obama said, addressing more than 2,000 uniformed service members in an aircraft hangar used to welcome home troops from Afghanistan.

"The terrorist leader who struck our nation on 9/11 will never threaten America again,"   he said.     "Our strategy is working, and there is no greater evidence of that than justice finally being delivered to Osama bin Laden."

Before stepping on stage, President Obama spent more than an hour with some of the special operations forces who carried out the late-night raid in Abbottabad, Pakistan, that killed bin Laden.

They briefed President Obama and Vice President Joseph Biden on the operation.     During the closed-door meeting, the president awarded the units involved the Presidential Unit Citation, according to the White House, the highest such honor that can be given to a unit.

"These Americans deserve credit for one of the greatest intelligence and military operations in our nation's history,"       President Obama later said in his remarks.

For the first time in his public statements since bin Laden's death, President Obama pivoted toward the next critical foreign policy decision of his presidency:   how many troops to pull out of Afghanistan in two months, the start of a deadline he set for beginning the drawdown of forces.

He said the U.S. mission in Afghanistan, which began 10 years ago this fall to overthrow the Taliban regime that had harbored bin Laden, is  "moving into a new phase."

Roughly 100,000 U.S. troops are currently serving in Afghanistan since President Obama ordered a surge 17 months ago.

President Obama's strategy calls for troop withdrawal to begin in July, but the number of departing troops is not clear.    The U.S. and other ally nations have agreed to maintain a presence in Afghanistan

through 2014, although the White House has said it would keep troops there longer if the Afghan government requests.

Some members of Congress, including Sen. Carl Levin, the Michigan Democrat who is chairman of the Senate

Armed Services Committee, are making the case that bin Laden's death should propel a significant drawdown of U.S. troops this summer.

Mr. Levin this week said that most Democrats and many other Americans favored a  "robust reduction"   of troops in Afghanistan.

But officials at the Pentagon and elsewhere have cautioned against a withdrawal that threatens recent gains in the country.

As he made the rounds this week to punctuate the demise of the man who was behind the deadliest attack on U.S. soil in modern history, Pesident Obama has strained to keep celebrating from crossing the line to gloating.

The hangar where President Obama addressed the troops was brimming with energy.    Some had arrived in the U.S. fewer than 24 hours earlier, following their third or fourth tours in Afghanistan.     As a live band warmed up the crowd for the president and vice president, some of the troops got up and danced.

Sgt. 1st Class Marcus Miller, a 32-year-old medical platoon leader, learned bin Laden was dead just as he finished up his third tour in Afghanistan.     He was still in the country, about to head home to Fort Campbell.

"I was happy,"    Mr. Miller said.     "For us it was very important since it was one of our top priorities."

President Obama noted that few have felt the burden of the post-9/11 world more than American troops, many of whom have spent years in Iraq or Afghanistan.

"I know it hasn't been easy for you and it hasn't, certainly, been easy for your families,"    President Obama  said.    "Since 9/11, no base has deployed more often, and few bases have sacrificed more, than you."

"We are going to ultimately defeat al Qaeda,"  President Obama said.     "As your commander in chief, I am confident we'll succeed in this mission."

While welcoming the death of bin Laden, some military members questioned whether bin Laden's death would do anything to lessen the strain.     "I think it means things will heat up,"   said Pfc. Aron Mock, who at 25 years old was in high school in Hawaii when terrorists crashed four planes into the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and the countryside in Pennsylvania.

At the White House on Sunday night, President Obama had thanked his national security team, specifically CIA Director Leon Panetta, for their work on the bin Laden operation.

By the end of the week, he had addressed the American people, spoken with members of Congress, visited with 9/11 families and first responders and publicly and privately congratulated members of the military.

President Obama's most somber moments came Thursday when he appeared at Ground Zero in Lower Manhattan.     He laid a wreath at the site of the terrorist attacks there and spent time with the families of those who were killed on September 11, 2001.     The president also had lunch with firefighters in who lost colleagues that

day.

But the White House's handling of the aftermath of bin Laden's death has not been entirely smooth.     In a rush to get out information about the raid in Pakistan, President Obama's aides mixed ups several key facts about the last moments of bin Laden's life – asserting at first that he was armed and used his wife as a

human shield.      Officials later said both statement were incorrect.

  

President Obama's approval rating shot up six points, to above 50%, in a Gallup poll taken in the aftermath of the bin Laden killing.     Other presidents have seem similar upticks after foreign crises or successes that rally the nation, but the effect has generally worn off after a few months.

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Virgil Goode Seeks Come-Back

Virgil Endorsed by Pencil Makers

When he represented the 5th district of Virginia Goode's re-election campaign was predicated on insulting seniors,

immigrants, Muslims, the mentally ill, homosexuals, teenagers, Northerners, and, eventually, pretty much

everyone, in as many different ways as possible.  

Some claim its photo shopped, but not the ones who were there.

Goode made it a habit of collecting money from lobbyists and was involved in many matters that led Congressmen and Lobbyists alike to federal prison.    Why the Constitution Party picks Goode to represent them in a run for President is a Mystery.    When Congressman Goode was defeated in his ultra conservative (Va 5th) backwoods district the general mood was good riddance, so now he seeks the presidency.

On May 6th, 2011 the Constitution Party National Convention Urges Virgil Goode to Seek Its presidential nomination.   So in addition to whoever the Republicans nominate Virgil Goode and other independent 3rd party candidates will face off with President Barack Obama to see who the voters pick to run the free world.

Here's Virgil giving his exciting speech to the group.     Not even Tim Pawlenty can stir an audience like Virgil.

 The National Committee of the Constitution Party, meeting in Harrisburg, PA, has, by unanimous resolution, adopted on April 30, 2011, put itself on record urging former Virginia Congressman, Virgil Goode, to seek the presidential nomination of the Constitution Party!

Immediately upon conclusion of Virgil Goode’s speech;  one in which he extolled the virtues of protecting America’s national sovereignty, condemned foreign aid and demanded the the United States start taking care of America’s problem first instead of meddling in the affairs of the rest of the world, providing a rousing climax to the 2011 Spring National Committee of the Constitution Party;   a motion from the floor was made, urging Goode to seek the Constitution Party’s Presidential nomination.     The motion was quickly seconded and was passed unanimously by the party’s national committee.       These folks are known for deep and intense study before taking action and supporting Virgil Goode was no exception.  
    
It is a clear statement that the National Committee views Virgil Goode as an excellent choice to be the Constitution Party nominee for President of the United States and for that reason strongly encourages him to seek its nomination.

Goode has made it clear to members in private and public comments at the meeting and prior thereto that he has a strong interest in seeking the party’s nomination, though he has made no public announcement to that effect as of yet.     Many Constitution Party leaders are hopeful that Goode has a strong campaign well underway by the time of the Constitution Party National Convention in mid-April of 2012, and it was hoped that this resolution would encourage him to take the steps necessary to become a full fledged candidate.

Goode had a habit of passing out pencils with his name on them to supporters as he worked a crowd during his congressional days so his endorsement by the  "Number Two Lead Pencil Corp"   comes as no surprise.    Over the course of Goodes many runs for office he has been republican, independent and democrat, now he will try on the Constitution Party.      As long as Virgil is promoting Virgil the party or label is not important.      

Former Virginia Congressman Virgil Goode said that   "it is time that America start taking care of its own serious problems rather than trying to cure the rest of worlds ails."     The general consensus was that it was Goode's finest and most powerful address since he first started attending Constitution Party national meetings in 2009  and was a portent of great things to come.

To all who decide to cast their lot with Virgil Goode take seriously his motto "With Loyalty to None".